Sunday, March 31, 2019

Holy Kitsch (and Mini-Golf), Batman!

This day was a on the docket to be a very long one, so we got up early and made our way to a place which is ubiquitous across much of the country, but which neither of us had been to before--Waffle House.

My impressions: no-muss, no fuss.  The menu is lean and not exactly inspiring, but covers your basics (and apparently every possible hash brown topping) at a very reasonable price.  I liked my eggs and sausage, but was not enamored of the hash browns (no toppings) and toast.

Then, we were on the road to Gatlinburg.  It was a long, but lovely, drive.  There are seemingly endless hills, with lots of trees along the way.  For a person whose usual long drive from Seattle to Portland is probably 2/3s urban or suburban, it was a really refreshing change. 

The rest stop we hit was clean, indoors (?!) and had several folk staffing it who were able to answer my question about the purple-blossomed trees.  Apparently they are called Redbuds.  One noted that while their color doesn't match their name, they're the reason his eyes are all red.  Heh.

Once we turned off I-40 towards Pigeon Forge and Gatlinburg we discovered a whole new world of ALL THE KITSCH!  And all the traffic.  The roads are lined with every sort of roadside attraction.  Many Ripley's museums, dinner shows, carnival rides, live goats (?), live alligators (??), and buildings in all sorts of shapes, from medieval castles to the Titanic.

By the time we finally reached Gatlinburg I was about ready to run away screaming, but we did manage to get ourselves parked and out among the throngs of vacationers.  Our first activity was a moonshine-themed escape room, which we did with a family of one father with three teen to pre-teen daughters.  We did not escape, but we were about thirty seconds away from completing the last puzzle when the buzzer went off.

Next we continued down the road and found a little place called The Village, which was very quaint and filled with little Old-World styled buildings with more modern shops.  Tom enjoyed the Fine Art gallery where he made a purchase of some lovely prints of naval battles.  We both found goodies at the Celtic store, and we enjoyed some German food in a quiet spot over the cheese shop.  It was nice to be someplace not swarming with people.

After that it was time for mini-golf.  There is so...much...mini-golf in Gatlinburg.  We played three courses.  The first was sort of Indiana Jones adventure-themed.  A pleasant enough course, and the first demonstration that if we are ever faced with needing to play mini-golf for any important reasons, I had better be the one to do it.  I won the first round 55 to 73.

Next was a nine-hole black light course, undersea themed.  Very nice atmosphere with nice art and appropriate music.  I won that round 24 (including a hole in one!) to 4`1.

Last was a really cool 18-hole course working its way up a hillside--built with nice wooden ramps and stairs and including some interpretive history of the area.  I won that round 51to 73.

Tom did find that he scored best when he sort of hit one-handed, backwards, and with a kind of sashay in time with the music.  I have NO IDEA how that worked, but it did.

Finally, it was time to escape Gatlinburg and go back up the road to Pigeon Forge.

We're in the hotel now and anticipating our full day at Dollywood tomorrow!

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